Genetic Résumé
Bred by Bulk Seed Bank, this is what happens when you let Amnesia, a sneaky indica, and a workaholic ruderalis have a three-way in a Dutch greenhouse. The result: a plant that flowers on autopilot, stays short enough for your closet, yet still flexes those classic Haze terps like it studied abroad in Amsterdam.
Effects or Lack Thereof
Expect a 15-25% THC rocket ride that launches creativity, euphoria, and the sudden urge to reorganize your Spotify playlists by BPM. Great for daytime use—unless your day includes operating forklifts or remembering your mom’s maiden name. Couchlock is optional; fridge raids are mandatory.
Flavor & Aroma: Zesty Gaslighting
Nose of citrus peel, pine-sol, and that incense your college roommate swore wasn’t weed. On the tongue it’s lemon pledge meets earthy spice with a hint of existential dread. Room note will have your neighbors convinced you’re either detailing a car or summoning a very chill demon.
Grow Report Card
Clocks in at 60–100 cm indoors—basically a bonsai on creatine. Seed-to-harvest in 10–13 weeks, meaning you can pull three runs before your landlord remembers to cash the rent check. Yields are respectable if you stop poking her every five minutes; LST and 18/6 light keep her from getting cranky.
Medical Use: Doctor, I Forgot My Trauma
Patients reach for it to vaporize stress, depression, and the memory of that 2 AM text to their ex. Appetite stimulation is on the menu—expect a grocery bill that rivals a car payment. Novices: maybe don’t chase anxiety away with a 25% THC monster unless you enjoy existential TED Talks.
Who Should Hit This
Perfect for growers who want photoperiod potency without the photoperiod hassle, and smokers who like their sativa slap with an auto-expiration date. Not ideal for anyone whose plans include parallel parking or remembering why they walked into the kitchen.
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