Auto Loveryder

The Origin Story Nobody Asked For

Bulk Seed Bank created Auto Loveryder when they asked, "What if we made weed... but impatient?" The result is a Frankenstein's monster of ruderalis, indica, and just enough sativa to make you think you might be productive before your brain downloads the latest software update: "Nope, you're melting into the sofa."

Effects: From Zero to Nope in 3.5 Seconds

This isn't the strain for your TED Talk. Auto Loveryder hits like a weighted blanket made of cotton candy – sweet, heavy, and suddenly you're wondering if you've always had this many eyelids. The 14-18% THC is the "training wheels" of potency: won't break your brain, but definitely breaks your motivation to do anything more complex than ordering takeout.

Flavor Profile: Lawn Clippings & Regret

Imagine if your neighbor's freshly mowed lawn got into a fight with a sugar cookie and lost. The aroma is sweet grass meets earthy "I should've cleaned my bong" with subtle notes of "why is my mouth this dry?" It's not winning any sommelier awards, but neither are you after smoking it, so fair's fair.

Growing: Even You Can't Kill This

Auto Loveryder flowers in 8-9 weeks from seed, which is roughly how long it takes you to text someone back. Yields of 400-500g/m² make it the overachiever of the "I literally just planted this and forgot" category. It's resistant to everything except your roommate's "helpful" watering schedule. Perfect for growers who think pruning is a fancy word for ignoring your plants.

Medical Benefits: Anxiety's Chill Cousin

With 1-2% CBD riding shotgun, this strain is the pharmaceutical equivalent of "have you tried just relaxing?" Great for stress, minor aches, and the existential dread of realizing you've been watching the same YouTube video for 45 minutes. Not great for operating heavy machinery or remembering where you put your phone (hint: it's in your hand).

Who Should Smoke This

Perfect for beginners who want to ease into cannabis like it's a lukewarm bath, or experienced users who need a reliable "I'm not trying to see God tonight" option. If your personality is "has a 10pm bedtime" or you've ever used the phrase "I'm just going to rest my eyes," congratulations, you found your spirit strain. Not recommended for people with actual plans.