Cherry Pie by Zamnesia

What Even Is This Pastry?

Cherry Pie is basically the cannabis version of sneaking a second helping at Thanksgiving and immediately regretting it. Bred by the dessert wizards at Zamnesia, it’s an indica-heavy treat that leans so far into relaxation it needs a seatbelt. Expect dense, purple-flecked nugs that look like they were rolled in sugar and then dipped in resin—because they basically were.

Effects: From Productive to Potato

One bowl and your to-do list becomes a ta-da list—you’ll wave goodbye to productivity as your body sinks into the nearest horizontal surface. Users report a euphoric head rush that politely escorts your brain to the couch, then tucks it in with a weighted blanket of bliss. Novices: clear your calendar; veterans: clear the snack aisle.

Flavor & Aroma: The Bakery Raid

Smells like you broke into a pie shop at 2 a.m.—sweet cherries, musky earth, and a whisper of “please don’t tell my diet.” On the inhale you get tart berry pie filling; on the exhale, grandma’s kitchen mixed with a skunky apology. Dominant terpenes myrcene, caryophyllene, and limonene team up to make your mouth water and your willpower evaporate.

Growing: Set It and Forget It (Almost)

Cherry Pie is so forgiving it might text you reminders to water it. Indoor, greenhouse, or “I forgot it on the balcony” all work, thanks to its 90%+ germination rate and bushy indica structure. Expect rock-hard colas in 8-9 weeks, coated in trichomes like powdered sugar. Yield is generous if you don’t binge the crop during drying.

Medical: Doctor’s Orders, Sort Of

Patients reach for Cherry Pie to fight insomnia, chronic pain, and the existential dread of adulting. The heavy body stone crushes stress like a hydraulic press, while the gentle cerebral lift keeps you from spiraling into “why did I say that in 2012” territory. Side effects include forgetting where you put the remote—while holding the remote.

Who Should Smoke This?

Perfect for night owls, overworked parents, and anyone whose FitBit keeps screaming “time to stand!” Not ideal before Zumba class, tax appointments, or operating heavy eyelids. Basically, if your evening plans involve pajamas and existential questions about the universe, welcome to the Pie club.