Extraterrestrial Banana

Space Passport & Family Tree

Spawned when Alien OG got frisky with a bunch of banana phenotypes (OG, Kush, Candy—basically the entire Chiquita crew). The result is a West Coast boutique cut that sounds like a 3 a.m. stoner thought experiment but somehow stuck. Think of it as the love child of E.T. and a fruit salad, raised exclusively in craft grow rooms that smell like a pastry shop on Jupiter.

Effects: Houston, We Have Munchies

Expect a cerebral liftoff that feels like your brain got upgraded to cosmic Wi-Fi—sharp, clear, and slightly paranoid your roommate is an alien. Fifteen minutes later the body high kicks in, turning your limbs into over-cooked spaghetti. You’ll giggle at conspiracy documentaries, then realize you’re the conspiracy because you just ate an entire loaf of actual banana bread while watching Ancient Aliens reruns.

Flavor & Aroma: Grandma’s Kitchen, Zero-G Edition

Crack a nug and it’s like someone baked banana custard inside a citrus-diesel oven. On the inhale you get creamy tropical pudding; on the exhale, lemon-pepper zing that politely throat-punches you. The room note lingers like you hot-boxed a Hostess factory. Pair with coffee if you want to taste banana crème brûlée, or pair with nothing and just huff the jar like a true degenerate.

Grow Tips for Earthlings

Medium-tall plants that respond to training like they actually want to be bonsai astronauts. Indoor height tops out around 3–3.5 ft, outdoor specimens can stretch to 6 ft if you feed them like a Michelin-star pastry chef. Flowers in 8–9 weeks, stacking trichomes so thick you’ll swear it snowed in July. Pro tip: save the sugar leaves—there’s enough frost there to press some rosin that tastes like banana taffy moon rocks.

Medical Uses (a.k.a. Doctor Spock’s Orders)

Patients report this strain evicts stress faster than a xenomorph eviction notice. Great for insomnia, anxiety, and existential dread caused by binge-watching space documentaries. The CBG presence (around 1%) adds a gentle anti-inflammatory hug for sore joints, while the negligible CBD means you’ll still be high enough to forget where you put your actual banana.

Who Should Board This Spaceship

If your idea of a wild Friday is horizontal time-travel to the fridge, welcome aboard. Ideal for seasoned stoners seeking dessert terps without the sugar crash, and for newbies who want to meet the aliens but still remember their Netflix password. Not recommended if you have an intergalactic drug test tomorrow or plans that involve standing upright for more than fifteen minutes.