The TL;DR
Imagine uncapping a fresh Sharpie, taking a whiff, and then that marker grows legs and judo-chops your nervous system. That’s this strain. It’s allegedly 50/50 on paper, but your couch will swear it’s 90% indica after one bowl.
Effects (or, How You Ended Up Ordering Three Pizzas)
Starts with a cerebral head-buzz that politely introduces itself, then body-slams you into plush sedation. Great for forgetting your ex’s Netflix password, terrible for remembering where you left the lighter you’re literally holding. Couch-lock level: Velcro.
Flavor & Aroma: Eau de Permanent Marker
Nose: spicy cedar box left in a high-school locker. Taste: peppery pinecone dipped in lemon pledge, with a finish that whispers “detention.” 85% of testers couldn’t stop talking about it; the other 15% were too busy licking the bong water to comment.
Growing It Without Killing It
Indoors she’ll squat 80–120 cm and reward you with 500–600 g/m² if you can keep LEDs off her ego. Outdoors she’ll stretch taller than your excuses. Flowering 8–10 weeks—basically two Marvel movies and a nap. Trichome coverage so dense it looks like she rolled in a snow globe.
Medical Uses (a.k.a. Doctor’s Note for Dank)
Perfect for chronic pain, insomnia, or existential dread after reading the news. The modest 2–3% CBD keeps paranoia on a leash while 18-24% THC melts your spine into soup. Side effects may include forgetting what you were mad about and an intense craving for orange slices.
Who Should Smoke This
Ideal for anyone whose daily planner says “cancel plans.” Not recommended for first dates, final exams, or operating anything with an on switch. If you’ve ever lost a remote and found it in the fridge, welcome home.
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